7/12/2005

1 on 1 with Karl Rove

VOX: In keeping with my tradition of providing fake yet accurate news, I've landed an interview with the man who is on everybody's mind and the Democratic Party's hit list. No I'm not talking about the next Supreme Court nominee, I'm talking about the Architect of Bush's victory, Republican strategist Karl Rove. Welcome Mr. Rove.

ROVE: Pleased to be here.

VOX: Word is all over the media that you're the one who leaked Valerie Plame's name to the press...

(Rove starts laughing)

VOX: Did I say something funny?

ROVE: Ha-hahahahahaha. Sorry. It's just that this is all so damn silly.

VOX: They're demanding your resignation, and you think it's silly?

ROVE: It is once it all turns out to be bullshit! Hahahahah!! They're so eager to have my head on a pike that they'll believe anyone and anything that comes their way.

VOX: Are you saying that your communications with Time magazine are fake?

ROVE: Let's just say that they're real, but the way the Dim-o-crats are playing is completely inaccurate. I did discuss Wilson with them, but I didn't blow his wife's cover. All I did was tell them was that Wilson has a habit of telling different people, different versions. Besides, everybody in the press already knew her and what she did for a living for years. When the Grand Jury testimony comes out and there's nothing there, the Dumb-o-crats going to have egg all over their faces.

VOX: This is all a trap to embarrass the Democrats?

ROVE: I don't set traps. I merely allow them to trap themselves. And they fall for it everytime! Oh, it's times like these that make me glad to be a Republican. Perhaps on the day the Grand Jury wraps up I'll send Wilson, his wife, and the Democrats a nice cake. A nice yellow cake.

VOX: Aren't you worried that this interview might expose your plan?

ROVE: The Dupe-o-craps don't look at anything farther right than the Daily Kos. Those that can read. Ooooh, that sounds like something Dean would say.

VOX: Nice talking to you Mr. Rove.

ROVE: Pleasure to be here.

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