12/21/2006

It's About Feelings, Nothing More Than Feelings...

A PAID POLITICAL ANNOUNCEMENT FROM
FORMER PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER

Sorry. Wrong picture.

Take 2:

A PAID POLITICAL ANNOUNCEMENT FROMFORMER PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER

My fellow Americans.

As you have probably heard, I have fallen victim to a vicious campaign of scurrilous hate speech where people have called me a 'bigot' and an 'anti-semite' simply because I left-handedly support the destruction of the Zionist Entity of Israel and the genocide of the Jewish people.

Now we all know that anyone who challenges my assertions and interpretations of history are nothing more than a bunch of war-mongering, blood-guzzling, pack of chickenhawk mass-murdering madman, but I won't lower myself to their sort of hate-speech.

What I am aiming to do at this blog is to present the real cause for all the troubles in the Middle East.

It all boils down to self-esteem.

You see our Islamic Brethren have oil, which is both cheap to produce and also wickedly expensive to buy. Yet their countries are all poorly run, corrupt basket cases, with high unemployment, rampant poverty, where people are regularly and savagely brutalized by their own governments.

And this is all caused by low self-esteem.

And what is the cause of this low self-esteem?

Jews.

You see a small number of Jews in a tiny little corner of the Middle East have carved out a nation that not only has a functioning democracy, but also a thriving economy, and they don't have the instantaneous wealth brought by oil.

Can't you see how this makes our Muslim brothers feel?

No matter what, lives in the Middle East have been getting progressively worse for the past five or six centuries, and the presence of non-Muslims being successful with a hell of lot less than what they have, is just too much for their pride to bear.

Now you could offer advice that maybe they should dump their dictators and replace them with systems that are more democratic and less oppressive and that would help make them as successful as the Israelis, but that would be RACIST NEOCON TALK.

And you don't wanna be a racist Neocon, do you?

The best hope we have for peace is to let our Islamic Brothers push the Jews into the sea, then they might stop being mad at us for being so rich and successful.

It could work.

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