5/11/2007

George W. Bush Doesn't Care About White People

A
PAID
POLITICAL
ANNOUNCEMENT
BY
KATHLEEN SEBELIUS
Democratic Governor of Kansas


My fellow Democrats and other assorted Kansans.

There are some people, raving fascist types, who are daring to criticize my handling of the tornado that destroyed the town of Greenburg, Kansas where I held back on calling in the National Guard to help people for 2 days while making statements to the press that the Kansas National Guard was undermanned and under-equipped because of the war in Iraq.

Okay, so maybe it wasn't true.

Or accurate.

So what that the Kansas National Guard had over 83,000 men, 393 trucks and 352 Humvees available to help a town of 1,500 people.

I had a political point to make.

I'm a Democrat, and there was a natural disaster in my state. It is my sworn duty as a Democrat to use my constitutional power to withhold needed aid and then lie about it to the press by blaming it on the Bush administration and the Iraq War.

And the press bought it, lock, stock, and barrel because it fits the narrative they want to hear and what they want to propagate.

So what if it isn't true.

My only complaint is that newbie Obama got all those fascist blogger types fact-checking by declaring over 10,000 people died in a town of 1,500.

Rookie mistake.

He has to learn that when selling the press lies about the Bush administration you need to follow some simple guidelines:

-Say nothing the Feds do is right.

-Blame Bush for that.

-Say that there are shortages of men and material even when there isn't one.

-Blame the Iraq War for that.

-Blame Bush for the Iraq War.

-Blame Global Warming.

-Blame Bush for Global Warming.

-Keep your bogus 'Body Counts' within the population of the affected area.

-Blame Bush for the high body counts.

-When real death tolls come out, blame Bush for miscount, but keep repeating the incorrect numbers to the press.

-Blame Bush for that too.

-Rinse.

-Repeat.

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