Cheese Eating Surrender Monkey




VOX- Welcome everyone. Now you've been subjected to some Paid political announcements from Democrat Majority Leader Harry Reid. Today, Senator Reid announced that he and his minions in congress will pass a bill demanding to start the surrender withdrawal of US troops on October 1st and hopefully have the genocide started within 6 months. And I've convinced Senator Reid to join me to discuss this new development in a Moment of Truth Interview.

REID- I never agreed to one of your Moment of Truth Interviews!




REID- Let me out of this tube! Let me out!

VOX- I'm afraid you can't come out of the Magical Vox Poplar Patented Tube of Truth until you have answered some questions. Okay, let's get this interview started. Why do you want the US to withdraw so quickly from Iraq?

REID- Because it looks like the surge is working dammit! And it's only a matter of time before our friends in the media can't ignore it anymore, and that would hurt us.

VOX- Who is this 'us' you're talking about?

REID- Democrats. If this war gets won we can kiss our majority in congress goodbye, and if we lose that, we'll lose all that sweet, sweet money from big business and political action groups.

VOX- So you're willing to humiliate America, embolden jihadis and condemn Iraq to a real civil war, no doubt involving a nuclear Iran to win elections?

REID- Of course. That's the credo of the Democratic Party: Do whatever it takes to win power, no matter how many people it kills. That's why Nancy Pelosi had to go to Syria to screw things up. Lebanese and Syrian pro-democracy forces were starting to get a footing, and they would owe it all to George Bush taking down Saddam Hussein, we can't dare let anyone show democracy is better than tyranny.

VOX- Shouldn't the Democratic Party be supportive of democracy?

REID- We only support democracy when it's corrupt and allows demagogue dictators like Hugo Chavez and Robert Mugabe take over countries and run them into the ground.

VOX- So Democrats support dictatorships?

REID- If it will help us gain seats, definitely.

VOX- What about all the shenanigans with Henry Waxman launching investigations into every time Karl Rove farted?

REID- We also can't allow a Republican administration to function. So we must launch all kinds of pointless and politicized witch hunts to paralyze the government and make the Republicans look bad.

VOX- Wouldn't doing such things during wartime be construed as treason?

REID- Of course it's all treason, but sometimes treason is necessary to seize power. Then we can yank Fox News's broadcasting license and start imposing speech codes on blogs like this. We can't afford having anyone asking us hard questions, it might promote dissent. How can we declare Al Gore President for Life if we allow people to question him?

VOX- Good point. I guess that's all the time we have for now, so I'll see you all later.

REID- Lemme out of this damn tube!

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